|not sure what they're all doing...|
|but the sentiment is this: Thank You.|
That's how many Thursdays ago we were coming home from the hospital, in a fog of shock, after spending the evening holding the baby that was supposed to be alive but wasn't. All 21.25 inches, 7 lbs 7 oz of humanness that was grown, in secret, for 40 weeks and 6 days in my womb. I would imagine that even at 52 Thursdays, 78 Thursdays or 112 Thursdays, I will still feel a bit of "What the heck just happened...".
I will never be able to look at our garden tub the same. Do you have a spot on this earth, that you can go to, and know your life was changed forever? Sometimes for the worse, maybe for the better? I can't say that my spot is either...definitely can't clean that tub without thinking about, replaying all the moments of that Thursday, June 30, 2011, where my life changed with two pushes, frantic midwife eyes, practiced hands of her and her assistant and pleas of "Please, breathe, little fella...c'mon...it's your momma, you can do this..." before utter shock and disbelief set in and I knew.
I knew that that little guy, who looked SO much like his daddy, had departed this life.
Just want to say thank you.
To you, heart broken momma, crying out for help...thank you for visiting my blog. Please know that I am here for you. Just contact me...don't go it alone. I haven't had to, so you shouldn't have to either.
To you, friend, fellow mother, sister, grandpa, cousin, whoever you are...thank you for caring. Thank you for serving. Thank you for mercy and grace. Friends who remain for these gritty days. Cards sent for 35th Thursdays, mommas courageous enough to share their stories...
Sweet Jack, thank you for your brave life, nary a moment lived in vain...
Heavenly Father, thank you for a sunny Thursday. Your Grace...we are swimming in it.
Rejoice in the Lord, Alway...and again, I say REJOICE.