Biking in the Culdy

burning some energy in Becky's nearby cul-de-sac. good times.

Nora was just down right hilarious on her bike...as her bike would be falling after trying to maneuver curbs, she'd stay upright. and notice her zebra butterfly wings. sweet girl.

Molly. speedy.

Piper, so talented, that she can ride her sassy Barbie bike whilst scratching her tootsies.

Melanie loves her Electra.

Levi, finally getting biking. We delayed on this with him and now it's somewhat tricky for this big, nearly 9 year old boy to maneuver. Gooo LEVI!

Thanks to my cousin, Kara, who is an amazing Pinterest, Etsy, and general scout for all things cool and crafty, I will now implement JOY into every season. Not only a good reminder of a beautiful Christ-like characteristic but of a beautiful boy who was just too precious to walk this dusty ol' earth.

I miss you, Jack.

So, anyways...not much going on here except for some amazingly cool temperatures (I love you, Fall), busy schedules (holy cow, when am I supposed to breathe?), and just general struggling to keep my head above saddened waters, all is well. I talked to my incredible midwife today. I love you, Mary Helen. Thank you for thinking of me, my family and sweet little JOY boy. I hope you get your JOYful birth any day now.

I met with my friend, Christine, at Starbucks, where she had a nice display of JOY and butterfly treasures awaiting me. Today is also 1.) Stillborn, Miscarriage, SIDS awareness day, and 2.) Pumpkin Spice release date at the 'bucks. not that the two are related but....

when one is trying to make it day by day, hour by hour, minute by minute, second by second, finding JOY in the little things takes on a whole new meaning. ya know?

I do not take lightly the kind things that people, all of you, you know who you are...have done for me and for my family. I really could cry, and have, just recalling the kindnesses shown, the care given, the prayers lifted and the tears shed on our behalf.

Gosh. Thank You, Lord, for showing Yourself in Your people.

On a side note: we went downtown to visit Victory, the statute that sits atop the Soldiers and Sailors monument on the circle...I hope to "lift", borrow, use some of Tom's pix on here very soon.

I'm a scatterbrained ninny. Good night and God bless you.

P.S.  Shellee, I do hope that when you are in town, you will give me shout out so we can meet up and hug and for me to meet Grace. but be warned. I will cry.

Ok. nighty. for reals.

some days are better than others...

I'm working on a way to always have a little charm of Jack with me, so I can look at it when I need to, show someone without overwhelming them with a gigantic pic of my sweet angel boy. I am also working on, and hoping to have a sterling silver JOY bracelet made up soon. I will post when it's done.

Jack's grave last week...

There is a page for each kid, and this one, which has a pic of our family and one of Jack in the pocket...such a cute idea.

she wrote me a letter, which is safely tucked away in the pockety part of the lunch bag book.

the cover of Mel's gift to me...lunch bag book...held together with sock monkey ribbon.

Hi there. It's hot today. Our septic tank is backing up. Kids are busy,busy, busy with their school work and I'm stuck in a rut of sadness.

I put on a normal face but he's always there. From the book I'm reading, called "They Were Still Born", this is just the way it's always going to be. I like this book because 1.) The title implies that he was STILL born, even if he died...and 2.) It's chock full of essays written by people, men and women, that lost their baby before birth. Some lost their babies days before, knowing that they would deliver a still child and some, like me, thought that they were delivering an alive child only to be smacked in the face with the reality that our babies had died. I still can't believe it. I'm really struggling with this today, really missing that little fella. It's 8 weeks tomorrow...life goes on, right?

Yup. septic tanks back up, bills get paid, kids need to be run here, there, hither and yon and I still wish my baby boy was here. That will never change. Life does go on, God is still good, I still trust His Son, Jesus Christ, but my family is missing someone. This is my story...

Had a good, unexpected cry driving up 37 today...the close your eyes while you drive, uh oh, kind...then while making salsa because I kept thinking about all the salsa I ate while I was carrying Jack, and the thoughts that would run thru my head..."Ohhh, such good baby growing food I'm eating today...this boy will love salsa"!

Ok, well, just so ya know, that's where I'm at. missing our baby, loving and enjoying my living children to the best of my ability...cherish.

Hope you are doing well! Thanks for stopping by, thanks for praying, thanks for thinking of me, dropping me notes, sending things, crying with me. Means the world to me.

Mel turned 13...over a week ago.

Mel's Zebra ring...

We coerced her to get out of the pool to open gifts, and she was none too thrilled at being in her bathing suit with wet hair for these pix. O well.

I still really find it hard to believe that this girl is a teenager now. In true teenager form, she's texting (but not ridiculously, tho she DOES manage to catch every text from her friends and somehow MISS the ones from me....hmmmm), she is primping and beginning to take an active interest in self care. And she rolls her eyes and acts rather annoyed with me. I have a solution for that. but I won't blog about it.

Yes, I'm a horrible mother. I'm just NOW blogging for Mel's birthday. Because she has managed to acquire David's HTC EVO phone, I think she can forgive me, us, for the busyness of the past week +.

We had her party the same day as our Memorial Day picnic. It was a nice, hot day to be in the pool. She got lots of nice things and money to spend on some clothing, make-up and whatever else struck her fancy. I think it's all gone now. dang.

So now I have 3 teenaged bodies in my house. In all honesty, so far, it's not as bad as I've heard. I do truly believe I have three of the nicest kids around so that helps. They've had to deal with a lot over the years and they're growing into some fine young adults. I do thank the Lord for that...a definite blessing.

In other news, I feel kinda crappy today. I think that's a good sign. I just need to have this baby. soon. I hope to be able to blog about ________ ___________ Young very soon!!

no title...

Molly thought these roses were for her....

Levi got a job at Steak N Shake...isn't he cute?

Melanie did too...maybe now we will get some service there!

Don't have much to say tonight...just wanted to post some pix of the 3 remaining kids. Will and Ethan will be home tomorrow afternoon and we are VERY excited! David did get to see them last night and he said Will isn't coping well with lack of sleep...awww. my poor sweet boy. He wasn't in Will's cabin, but he was in E's so I got to talk to him for a few minutes. It was great to hear his voice and that he was doing well...sniff.

On that note, good Friday night...hope this finds you well. adios.

Saturday happenings....

Our local credit union, Teacher's, hosted a Community Day at our favorite local library, Greenwood Public Library...this magician guy was pretty funny!

Mel got to represent Snow White, along with Lauren as Belle, Sarah as Aurora, and Annie as Tinker Bell. it was so flippin' adorable to see little kids walk up to them with adoration in their eyes....such sweet girls to play these roles. awwww. amazing!

such beauty...all over the place.

Levi really wanted to get his pic taken with all these pretty girls. Who could blame him? his big brothers weren't brave enough to do so...David did, but I will have to scan his pic in...he had it taken before I got there. ha ha. fun times.

Let me explain...look at the pic right below. This blue cat guy is Boomer...he is the mascot for our local Pacers team. As soon as Nora saw him, she kept her face buried for a good part of an hour...it was kinda funny. ya either love or hate him....he was a good sport. as you'll see below.

The princess squad even wanted a pic with Boomer.

Mel had to carry Piper over for her pic...she was none too thrilled.

Boomer was a good sport and snuck up behind our seated crew...notice Nora's hands. hilarious.

Grandpa and some of his girls!

Molly loves her Grandma. you just can't tell here...she was ready for some coffee.

Becky got brave and wanted a pic with Boomer!

Hi.

How are you?

All is well here...we are alive. that's about it. :) waaa. I'm such a complainer. forgive me. it's still winter.

We are thinking of high-tailing it outta here. just chucking all of our responsibilities and going to a beach or somewhere like that. Frisbee, quiet time, change of scenery. I dunno. we will see.

On a fun note, my little sister turns 33 tomorrow. WOW! I can't believe this...she was JUST 16. really. We are having her birthday party tomorrow, as well as Tom and David's. We figure it's 2 less cakes that none of us "need" (but surely want, yo). And I know she isn't fond of the combination party but....

this year, Tom turns 41. He's really ok with that. David, on the other hand, turns the big 4-0. To celebrate, we are hosting a roller skating party here in town...chock full of 80's music and good times. You know you are invited...you can contact me for the full details. It only costs 3 dollars for skate rental...admission is on us. After the skate, we are caravanning to a local restaurant, dutch, and will finish up the celebration there. This all takes place on March 19th. 3 days before David has surgery to ensure that #6 is our last. Pray for him...it's a wiggish event.

I hope to take lotsa pix tomorrow at the 3 in 1 party...I also hope to get our pix on here from last week's field trip to the Indiana Repertory Theatre's production of The Diary of Anne Frank. awesome. Promises, promises...I'll treadmill now and blog more later...I've posted the February 2011 album on Facebook so you can go see more of today's pix there...adios.

forgive the all over the placedness.

Daughters...

Love that John Mayer song about said title....

and the Lord has truly blessed our family with two lovely, sweet daughters.

...and now she's TWELVE...

hard to believe this was five years ago...Princess Leia hair.

this was from 2007...how my kids have grown...sniff

YOU are a lovely soul, Melly.

someone was a tad jaundice-y upon arrival on the outside...

less jaundice, no blood shot eyes, strawberry birthmark on arm a distant memory...

Piper is very attached to her cool cousin, Will, right now...

coolios

Piper is such a big girl...she bought Melanie a pair of cool Peace earrings! Thank You, Piper....

I can't imagine where on earth this child gets her crazy photo taking antics? we love this family...

wondering when, in the dickens, Mel is going to start opening presents. hee hee.

whadja get, Mel?

with the adorable mini -Tammy, Annie

with the other adorable mini-Tammy, Sarah!

with her new beauty of a friend Rebecca, a girl Mel met at Kaleo.

with beautiful Madison...(her entire fam came but I failed to post a pic because it would have been sadly out of order when I realized I had actually taken some group shots. nice)

Grams and Gramps got her a DQ ice cream cake...

I usually have a drawer full of candles...but I could only find ONE. again, nice.

an amazingly lovely group of young ladies...we are blessed to have these females in Mel's life! This was after the evening swim...enjoying pina coladas and cook out left overs.