I've made a mess of me...

I wanna spend the rest of my life ALIVE!!

So, in my daily prayer journal, I've started writing down blog post ideas. I have so many thoughts and ideas that come to me and most of them, I lose because my memory can be so sketchy...

Something that the Lord has really been laying on my heart/our hearts is health. Spiritual health first followed by physical health. How that looks for us each day is something like this.

~Upon waking up, and for the past year (for me), I read my Bible, spend some time in prayer. That may sound trite, trivial, simple...but it is the secret to a healthy, growing walk/relationship with the Lord. There are so many Psalms and Proverbs about starting out your day in meditation, prayer and time with Him.

Here's the thing...I grew up in a Christian family, going to a Baptist church, involved in my youth group and whatever age group I was a part of...I know I took a lot of that for granted. Upon moving to Indy in the fall of 1991, I had one year of singleness before that wild haired lumberjack stole my heart, beginning in the fall of 1992 (I was in such denial about that guy but by April of 1993, we were engaged)...One could say that we "looked" like we were a couple that stayed involved in our church and went through all the proper churchy, Christ-like movements...

For 18 years, the Lord sought me and I'd "give in", play the part, fizzle again and on it went...until that spring of 2011...when I cried out to Him, to show up, to be real to me...oh did He. Since that time, the Lord and I have walked together, though challenged and difficult at times, seeming silent or far away at others, but together...I am so thankful for the growth that has taken place. Though not pretty, or gracious at times, it has my eyes wide open...It seems I'm seeing things more through His eyes...now to learn to be more merciful...that is my next hurdle...blog post to follow??

Which brings me to this point....I had to go through gut wrenching pain to realize what a blessing it is to have a daily walk with the Lord....I'd say that no mother should ever have to go through losing a child but who am I to say that? I praise the Lord for that time...yeah, it doubled me over and knocked every stilt out from under me...for some reason, unbeknownst to me, our family was chosen to walk this path. I praise Him...it has opened my eyeballs wide to seeing the importance of taking care of my spiritual health.

It has also opened my eyes to seeing how important me taking care of me is. That has been a struggle since, heck, birth...I come from a long line of comfort eaters, non-skinnies, Swedes, Scots, whatever....I'm short, my childhood doctor made the mistake of telling my mom, in front of me, that I wasn't fat, just "husky". sheesh...body image problems anyone??

I know the struggle is real, I face it every day....I run but I eat....something's gotta give...I saw my ALS ice bucket challenge video last night and nearly died when I saw it. My baby would be three....there's no reason why I still have 40 extra pounds and an inner tube around my mid-section. I watch, and not even as intently as my sis and bro have, the struggle my mom is facing with extra weight and it makes me sad, mad at my gramma for always trying to soothe her kids, her grandkids with FOOD....when our comfort should've come from the Lord...why weren't we taught this?? Even now, I turn to food for comfort...and it ticks me off.....I need real help...I need to be here for my kids, I need to be a better example for my kids, for people around me, for the Lord. HE is my comfort and strength, ALONE...people, food, situations, will always let me down. heck. yes!

I need help. I need to really, truly drop the extra lbs once and for all. Over it.

so that's where I'm at....I wanted to address spiritual and physical health before I addressed friendship.

if you can't get these first two aspects, very basic aspects, of life managed, then the other aspects of life, I believe, become even more difficult to manage.

Friendship is a very real struggle for me. I have odd, broken relationships floating around out there and I don't like it. I have a blog post formulating in my head about this but just not sure as of yet...Just have to reassure myself that there is a friend that sticks closer than a brother.

I'll have to blog about that another day but hopefully this mumbo jumbo above makes sense and that you, my faithful reader, know that I share because I care and I love. Charity starts at home...Ministry starts at HOME.

right HERE!

good night 

thriving, not just surviving yo

Up at Adam's Hill (is that correct) high atop Cincy, last week. I had this horrific expression on my face
because a couple near by seriously needed to "get a room". and this place was kinda spooky.

Cincinnatti

This is the bridge we walked on the next day...those grates? yeah, they are the road. it was slightly scary.

a new kind of zinnia that we planted this year and I'm in love.  Must have more
for next year...they remind me of Muppets.

Fun fact for ya...this small, old, abandoned bank in the lower area of Waverly was robbed by the one and only John Dilinger. 

On the rare occasion that 1.) Will was home long enough to swim and hang out and 2.) it was warm enough for the pool.
It has been an unusually mild summer. I'm not complaining but the swimmers are.

The Rooster (red head center) and his ladies. Has been such a fun summertime addition. Though I could do without Molly's dirty feet and insane desire to constantly pick these guys up. Hannibal, the rooster, is huge and kinda mean ish.

Have I blogged about this yet?? If not, I shall but this is Tim Foreman, bassist/vocals for Switchfoot. I have a whole blog post on this, brewing in my head. 

July 19, 2014...Allerton Mansion for Nathan and Samantha's wedding. Such a beautiful day, wedding, atmosphere!
I'll have to blog about this later on also!

So our friend, Randy, came for a visit. We haven't seen him for at least two years so it was wonderful
to visit with him again! We love ya, fella!

These crazy cats are doing well, all things considered. Mom had already had her surgery in this pic. She has had some issues with wound healing. My sis and younger brother have done an amazing job taking care of these issues for her.
Tom, Dad and I, well if it was up to us, she may not be here anymore.
as far as wound care goes....it's not pretty folks, but she's on the mend! Thank you for praying for her!
Glad you are getting better, Momma.

Not a very clear pic of Jon Foreman.
More on this later.....

I have so much updating to do...

all on top of so many deep thoughts and such that I've been carrying around with me.

I kinda don't even know where to start...

so when I left off, Molly had just turned 7. Has it really been over a month since I blogged?? I'm so lousy about this anymore. sheesh.

A few updates:

July 3 - David, Will, Mel and I went to a Switchfoot concert at the Murat, along with a slew of the kids' friends (heck, they're our friends too ya know)...Kelsie, Luke, Mati, Megan, Paul and Austin. Will has been inspired by their music. They don't call their music "Christian" because they want their music to be heard by everyone...and they take their music into uncomfortable places...which is what we should be doing as believers of Jesus Christ. Their show was incredible...this pic above is when Jon Foreman came down into the crowd and essentially right up to where Megan and I were standing! Everyone was pawing him..I squeezed his shoulders and he did a little "whoop whoop" with us...it was pretty cool. (I felt like a stinkin' teenager)...we stayed for their after show, which I will have to find those pics...and Jon very obviously has a relationship with the Lord. We met Chad Butler (drummer) and I told him he "rocked"...yeah, Mel cringed a little but hey....he did. super talented guys, and from what we've seen, in person and in all of their music/YouTube/documentaries etc, they live what they believe. Kinda restored my faith in fellow man. for a bit.

July 4 - Levi and I worked on a major job with David...Brownsburg Middle School install of D's HYBRID flooring. Levi and I watched fireworks after work and the entire drive home. kinda cool.

July 11 - Mom had surgery...did really well. Lost 19 lbs of tissue...the road to recovery is long but already, a month later, she is able to stand up straight and get around better, even with her wound issues. Thank You, Lord. On to good health!

July 14-18 - David and Mel went to Woodlands Camp in GA. They had a wonderful time!

They got home on Friday night, we went to Illinois the very next day for Nathan and Samantha's beautiful wedding, drove home late that night (almost wrecking, pulling over to sleep it off) because on Sunday by noon, we had to head out to take Mel to Cedarville for Camp Electric. She met Mike Donehey from Tenth Avenue North that evening and I will have to blog those pics as well.

All in all, things are going very well...finding it hard to believe that four months from today, I will be 42 and we will be one week away from Christmas...ahhhhh. time is flying!

Molly cut her bangs on Friday. What is her deal, you ask? Creative genius is the only thing I can think of...she will be our family hair stylist, I guess.

So this is pretty much the update...I should be better about blogging because I feel like I'm forgetting a lot of stuff that I will want to remember in the future. That is my goal...to update this more frequently.

chickens are good
kids are good
hubby is good
I'm doing ok
people around us seem to be doing well.....

all thanks to God.

I'll be back with more later...I'll sincerely try not to wait another month.